whatever things will be, He has it planned out for you.

hectic. strange. yet excited, anticipating. but also scared, nervous. all too sudden. never knew it would be so difficult, so tedious. getting to a different stage of my life. everything changes too fast. i am afraid, clueless.
counting everything on my own. facing it on my own. whether it fails or succeeds all depends on me. such a scary thing.
 

fuck the past. fuck the present. fuck the old me.

after the new high comes a sharp low. I MISS YOU I MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOUI MISS YOU

I KEEP CHASING FOR THAT FIRST FEELING. BUT NO, YOU ARE THE ONLY EXCEPTION.

show me how to be cold. i want to be emotionless.

I will fall at your feet. I will fall at your feet. And I will worship You here.
i am sorry for not receiving you, and doubting you.

i wont miss you when i am gone. goodfuckingbye.

when my sanity hang by a thread
bring me out of this dark place again.

the river flows in you, through your veins. give me inner peace. ):

you asked me what happened. i have no answer all i know is that i miss you terribly. i told myself i wont cry for you again, wont shed another tear and yesterday, i crumble, i felt the pain again. today, i knew i hadnt recovered when i could not stop thinking about you how do i cure? what can i possibly do when i keep hurting and i can never stop hurting fake a smile, assure everyone but myself that im okay. i can never open up. you are my sunshine. and now you are gone i am left in this dark place all alone, once more